Working on my Dossier

Today I am collecting all my dossier documents for each to be sent to their originating state in order to be "authenticated" by the Secretary of State.

Here is where they are going:

Mississippi: 2 certified birth certificates
Virginia: 3 certified birth certificates, marriage license, notarized letter
Pennsylvania: 1 notarized letter
Colorado: birth certificate, marriage certificate
DC: birth certificate

And I just realized one of my reference's notary signatures has already expired so I can't send that one in yet...my reference has to do that all over again.  Which means my reference has to fill out another reference form, have it notarized, and send it to me in the mail.  Who knew!  The little things!  And then once I receive it in the mail, I can send it on to its respective state to be authenticated.

I am very happy that each state's website is pretty straightforward.  Most even have forms to print out and send in with the appropriate documents.  And they all take personal checks - yippee!  It would be impossible to do this if I had to get a money order or cashier's check for each one.

I am also pleasantly surprised at our mail system here at the embassy.  These envelopes are all going priority mail, so the states should receive them in 5 days.  It's exciting to actually be DOING SOMETHING!! and moving this adoption forward.  Or so, I hope!  We are still waiting for our home study draft.  It's been 5 months...

The Nest Orphanage

So we have been volunteering at the local orphanage lately.
It is so good for my kids.  They love holding the babies and playing with them.
Their staff is pretty low on the weekends and they need families to foster babies on the weekends.
So we are praying about whether we should do this.  My kids are very excited about it!

Here are a few pictures from our last 2 visits. (Okay bear with me, I can't seem to rotate them...)

We bought them 75 new bibs.  The kids were so excited to take the new bibs to the staff.

Electrical Problems and No Updates

Wow I am so excited to be sitting at a computer writing a blog post!!  (I'm writing this on all my blogs!)

My computer is dead - it somehow got a terrible virus when we arrived here and is completely unusable right now.

Then the power cord on Rachel's computer broke, and we JUST GOT A NEW ONE IN THE MAIL!!!  So this is the first time in almost a month that I have been able to type out my homeschool curriculum and print things again and blog again!

It is strange; we have had so many electrical problems since we moved here.  Kevin's 65" inch TV died, our VCR (that I just bought in the States this summer), Rachel's iPod dock, our computers, and today our bread machine died.  It took me forever to set up our printer and Vonage phone.  I still cannot use my fax machine.

To say it is upsetting is an understatement.  There have been some days where I just wanted to pack up and leave.  And then I remember we are here for a reason...so we trudge on.

And actually, there has been absolutely nothing to update.  We are still waiting to review our Home Study Draft from Little Angels.  It was the end of September when we finished all the home visits.  I am preparing my Dossier materials to be Authenticated.  But I cannot resolve my fax issues - - so I cannot fax my documents to my agency in the States for review.  I have had a very, very difficult time of paperwork since moving here.  Silly issues like trying to find U.S. money orders and mailing documents and faxing materials.  Things that are super easy to do in the States but has been impossible here.  I do not know why.  I am trying to stay encouraged.  With the Spirit's help.

There have been many days recently where I have prayed:  "Okay, God, is adopting still Your Will for our family?"  That is how seriously difficult it has been.  So I still keep doing paperwork.  And I still keep praying, waiting for a Word.

Short Rains Season

We received our U.S. background clearances in the mail this week.  I ordered two sets - one from the actual FBI, which will already have the apostille (msp?) stamp on it and one from a private company that we paid to have expedited here.  I am not sure which one will be accepted by the government, so that's why we went ahead and ordered both.  The FBI said it could take up to 8 weeks to receive theirs in the mail.

Now I am in the process of working on my dossier, which means sending each of my individual documents to the Secretaries of State in which they originated.  I am so happy to have a way to mail things here!  And to have a DPO address!  It takes only a week and a half to receive mail here as opposed to 3+ weeks with the diplomatic mail system we had in Taiwan.  That cuts the time in half!  So even though we have a lot of documents to mail back and forth from overseas it will definitely be a little easier with this system set in place.

It is turning fall in the States, but it is the "short rains" season here.  It rains a little bit every day and pretty much every night.  But it is very warm when the sun is out, so we spend a lot of time at the pool during the day when it is not raining.  We are decorating for Halloween.  Apparently Halloween is a big deal here on the compound, just like our neighborhood in Taiwan.  The kids are so excited and can't wait!

There is a lot of stuff going on here in Kenya.  The military here has gone into Somalia to push back AlShabaab, who keeps coming over the border and kidnapping people from Kenya.  The kidnappings are maddening, so although I hate war, I am happy that Kenya is standing up and defending themselves.
In fact, yesterday a helicopter flew over many times with this banner attached:  "Defending Kenya".

It was a good morale booster.  Go Kenya!

Today is a Kenyan holiday, Mashujaa Day.  Happy Heroes Day!

Journeys

I have been on a lot of journeys throughout my life.

Forgiveness journeys. Spiritual journeys.  Single-mom journey.  Pregnancy journeys.  

And all of them refined my personality to make me more like Jesus.

My current journey - this adoption journey - is teaching me lessons about patience and control that I would probably rather not learn, because it is painful.  Very painful.

God gave me a Word two weeks ago:  Make the most of your time while you have it.

In that time I have really grasped the concept of what it means to be joyful, even in the seemingly mundane things like washing dishes.  Like, real joy.  Happiness.  Peace.  Even when I would rather scream because things won't hurry up and go the way I planned.  Like when I can't figure out this adoption process as quickly as I would like.  Or I can't control how a 3rd party is handling my case.  Like the adoption paperwork - waiting for it to process.  Or thinking of our baby sitting in an institution waiting to be picked up and rocked.  It almost kills to think about it.  So I pray  - - however odd this may sound - - that Jesus's angels would surround our baby.  That they would manifest into a physical form, and would hold our child and rock him to sleep.  That they would smile at him and sing to him and warm him with their arms.  Angels have taken physical form in the Bible.  Why couldn't they do it today and comfort our lonely child?  

God gave me a vision for this baby a while ago.  A vision that will change my entire family, not just me.  We are not going to be the same anymore.  Thank you, Jesus.  You are the ultimate healer.  You are alive today just as much as when you walked this earth 2000 years ago.  I praise you for that!  So change me, Jesus.  Make me more like You.

Home Study Draft

We have all our documents together except for our FBI clearances and child abuse checks.  We are still waiting for those to arrive in the mail.  I sent off for those a couple of weeks ago and I had the hardest time finding a place here in Nairobi that issued US money orders.  In fact, I went to 7 different banks and post offices, including downtown.  Nothing.  No one issues international money orders here.  After much frustration, my US-based adoption agency told me to mail them the documents and they would get the money orders and mail my documents.  Oh thank goodness.  How do other people do stuff like this if they don't have folks Stateside to help them?

So now we wait for our appointment to review the home study draft.  

Boy I just really really thought we would have Baby by Christmas, but it's October and we haven't even finalized the Home Study yet.  

Patience.  Patience.  Patience.  (I'll write more about that tomorrow.)

Home Visit Tomorrow!

We are very excited because our case worker is coming to conduct our Home Visit tomorrow.
Our household shipment arrived 7 days ago, and since then we have been unpacking boxes and organizing our stuff.  I hope we have everything ready for when she comes!  All our pictures await to be hung on the walls, but I can't control that...GSO has to come out and drill holes in our (concrete) walls for all those items.

All of our visits so far with Little Angels have been very good.  Tomorrow will be our 4th visit.
I am so impressed with Susan, our case worker.  I hope this is a good sign of the rest of our time with them.
This process is so long.  So I am glad we have a good working relationship with all the folks we are dealing with.

I am trying not to freak out about whether the house is clean enough or whether the kids will completely misbehave while Susan is here!  Because that all is a part of LIFE.  And the point of her being here, too, is to see us doing LIFE together.  Not to put on a good show for her.  So I have done my very best in the short time that I had to organize all my stuff.  So we'll see how it goes!

Visiting Little Angels

I visited our Kenya-based adoption agency two days after we arrived in Nairobi.
I needed to turn in the homestudy documents from my stateside agency as well as my documents such as birth certificates, marriage license, etc.
I hopped in a cab and drove for a long, long time.  Or so it seemed!
The roads here are almost hilarious in some spots.  There are pot holes big enough to lay down in and take a nap (no kidding).
And in one place our car went over a "bridge" which was some creaky boards draped across a huge ditch wide enough for only one car to fit across.  I held my breath as we passed over...
It was surreal to see the Little Angels logo on the outside gate of their little compound.
I have been corresponding with these folks online for so long, so it felt amazing to finally be there in person.
My usual contact there was on summer leave, so I waited around for an hour or so to chat with someone else that was filling in her place.
I turned in my documents and we talked for about an hour about the process in general.

At some point in the conversation I began to feel really uneasy.  There were a couple of topics covered that were completely different than anything I had read online or heard about.
First, the home study through LAN is a 12-visit process.  Or at least that is what was explained to me at the time.  If you are familiar at all with home studies, you know they are 4-6 visits maximum.  So I was shocked to learn this initial process would take months and months.
Second, she told me the youngest a child they ever adopt out is 6 months, but that young age is rare, too.

At this point in the conversation I had been there over two hours, my taxi cab fare was still running outside, and I was very upset about this new and different information I was presented.  So I stood up and left.  I was told I would be assigned a case worker and could set up my first appointment soon.

Fast forward four weeks.  Yes, 4 weeks.

No word from Little Angels.  I am irate at this point.  So through other friends, I found out there are 4 other agencies in Nairobi that process international adoptions.  I called one of them and set up a time to chat about doing the adoption or the homestudy through their office.
Unfortunately, my stateside agency works through Little Angels exclusively...
But at this point I was researching other stateside agencies to use, too.  This is how seriously upset I was about the whole thing.

I then contacted my case worker in my stateside agency and she was so sweet and explained that LAN's system had been down for a while.  And, true, when I finally got ahold of LAN via telephone, I found out: 1) my usual contact was still on summer leave until the week before, 2) the contact I met that day at LAN was actually on leave and out of town also, and 3) their internet had been down for 2 weeks.  PLUS, I was new to Nairobi and did not have a phone number yet...

It was the perfect storm of 4 things at one time that culminated into my getting lost somewhere in the middle.

When I finally spoke with my contact at LAN I told her I was switching to another agency for the homestudy, and she quickly explained to me that there are not 12 separate visits.  Just 12 separate topics that must be covered in the visits.  But the explanation I received and even the documents I have from LAN explain it differently.  Either way, she is emailing me a homestudy schedule (hopefully today) and I pray it will be what I expected.  She said we could start our first appointment next week.  So that is good news.

Why the rush?  Why do I get so upset so easily when I have to wait a measly 4 weeks?

Because my baby is sitting in an orphanage somewhere in this city.  My baby is WAITING for ME. He needs me to hold him and hug him and kiss him and feed him and give him a warm bed to sleep in at night.
He wants me to rush.  He needs his family NOW.

So that is why I am persistent.  That is why I am trying to hurry this process along.  Excuse me if I seem rude, but my baby is desperately waiting for me.

Adoption and Discipline

Boy it has been awhile since I last posted.
And I have a lot of things to write about, especially since we have arrived here in Nairobi.
Until then, I ran across the blog from the folks that run the Heart of the Matter seminars.
Julie posted an interesting article entitled:

Adoption and School: Why the classroom discipline plan often fails for our kids.

And although I homeschool my kiddos, this is still good information for our homeschool when Baby gets older.

Because They Waited

My adoption agency, like most all I'm sure, require 10 hours minimum of pre-adoption education.
Initially I assumed that meant reading books on adoption, etc.  And goodness, I have spent many, many hours researching online and reading books on the subject.
But then I found out what they really mean is, there is a 10 hour online course entitled Because They Waited.
It is done through Heart of the Matter seminars.

The course is interesting because it is Hague compliant and they send you a certificate of completion once you have finished the course.  So I purchased it online this morning.  $150.  Not too bad of a price.  Hopefully they will send our password soon and I can get started on it.

Here are a few of the courses in the package:

Promoting healthy brain development

Sensory processing and sensory integration

Parenting to a child's "real age" vs. chronological age

Understanding the internal alarm

Building attachment

Race and Culture

I'll let you know how it goes!
Have any of you completed your 10 hours?  What did you do?
:) jessica

Safari Friends

Dear Baby,

While shopping today we saw the cutest crib bedding set.  It is Safari Friends and just perfect!
Here is a picture.  I cannot wait to hold you in this blanket!

Daddy has come up with a name for you that he really likes.
Usually we never really agree on names, but I actually like this one.
It is a boy's name.  Are you a boy?

Love, Mommy

Pastoral Reference

I am holding my Pastoral Reference in my hand!

Another document marked off my checklist!!

Approved!

We just found out our application has been officially approved through Carolina Adoption Services.

Getting closer....!!!!!

Certificate of Good Conduct

This is our Taiwan Criminal Record Certificate. Isn't it cute??!

Finishing the Paperwork

Okay we are almost finished with gathering all our documents.

Our Taiwan criminal record has arrived in the mail. My personal reference and pastoral reference are working on their forms. We have the completed, notarized medical forms for all 6 family members, four certified copies of everybody's birth certificates, certified copies of our marriage license. On and on!

This is my collection of files. It is getting fatter and fatter. That's a good thing! We are very excited!!

Be Still My Heart

Nicholas wanted to sleep with our little African baby doll the other day.

My heart is literally melting!!

A Peace

I recently sent a follow-up email to the adoption agency in Kenya to make sure Kenya has no restrictions on the number of prior children living in the home.

I looked all over the internet and found nothing with restrictions listed.

And yep, Kenya has no such restrictions.

But...the standard is "best interests of the child", so we have to be able to show to the social worker that we are able to "accomodate" another child. Aw man I love my big happy family and I cannot wait to show the social worker how our family functions. I know I will be judged whether I can "handle another kid", so it is sort of nerve-racking realizing someone else is judging me as a mother. And honestly there are days when I don't feel like I can handle ONE kid, let alone a whole house of kids.

But that's the point: I can't handle ANYTHING on my own! It is only with the power of the Holy Spirit that I do any of this on a daily basis.

So I have a peace and a confidence that only the Lord has been able to give. I will not be anxious about the home study. Bring it on!

Creation Groans from Christian Alliance for Orphans on Vimeo.

Saving My Shirt

Today on the way to church, Sabrina, our 4-year-old, suddenly said, "When God sends us our African baby, I am going to save this shirt for him."

She was wearing her favorite Oscar the Grouch shirt. No one was even talking about the baby at that time.

Of course, I cried :)

Two New Contacts!

I am so blessed to be in contact with two other families in the U.S. who have recently adopted from Kenya. They have been incredible with providing me all sorts of answers to my (many) questions about timelines and agencies and the process in general.

Truly a blessing from the Lord. An answer to prayer. Thank you Jesus!

How I Orderered Birth Certificates

Here's a great article entitled, "If You Can't Adopt Just Yet" on adoption.com.

That site has so much information!

Right now, the only thing I can do is start gathering the information I will need for my file.

And it's a good thing I am doing it now because it takes me about 3 weeks to get mail where I currently live overseas. And...vitalchek will only mail documents to the same address that is on your credit card file. So I have to get these now or else I will most likely have to wait to request them until we move to our next post.

So, today I ordered 4 copies of all the kids' birth certificates, my birth certificate, and our marriage license. I ordered from vitalchek.com and the process was super fast and easy. Now I just sit and wait for them to arrive. In the meantime I will try to figure out all this apostille stuff I keep reading about!

Found an interesting article dated March 25, 2011 that mentions Kenya and the adoption process there.

African adoptions drop as economic crisis bites

International adoptions by Americans have decreased sharply due to the economic crisis and increased regulation imposed after high-profile celebrity cases, agency officials said.

Angelina Jolie and her adopted daughter Zahara, who was originally from Ethiopia Photo: GETTY

By Mike Pflanz, Nairobi 9:00PM GMT 25 Mar 2011

In 2004, American families adopted almost 23,000 children from around the world, but by 2010 that figure had more than halved to 11,058, according to US State Department figures.

"We have stopped organising adoptions for overseas clients because it was just too hard to find good families," said Leah Kigutha, director of Maji Mzuri Children's Centre in Nairobi, Kenya.

A surge in enquiries up to 2010 "attributed to publicity surrounding Madonna's case" had stalled as increased legislation governing adoptions was discussed by the US authorities, Ms Kigutha said.

The Hague Convention on Inter-Country Adoption entered into force in the US in early 2008, at the same time as Madonna's case to adopt David Banda, a Malawian toddler, was bogged down in a Lilongwe court.

Angelina Jolie had earlier adopted an Ethiopian girl, Zahara, in 2005, and had given birth to a natural daughter, Shiloh, in Namibia, in 2006.

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But it was Madonna's alleged circumventing of Malawi's regulations on adoption which demanded that a prospective parent live in the country for a year before adopting which raised hackles.

"So much changed at that time," said a British aid worker living in Nairobi who battled for three years to adopt a Kenyan orphan. She would not give her name to protect her son's identity.

"We had been jumping through bureaucratic hoops up until then, but we thought we were making progress. After the whole Madonna thing, everyone just became supersensitive about foreigners adopting African kids."

Statistics on adoptions from Kenya were not immediately available.

But the US State Department shows one African country which is bucking the downward trend.

Ethiopia last year remained the second most popular country for international adoptions to the US, after China, with 2,511 children starting new lives with American parents.

This was up from 2,275 the year before, and from just 284 in 2004, according to the State Department website.

"With or without Angelina and Brad, the world knows that there's an awful crisis of abandoned children here," said one adoption agency director in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia's capital.

"We must hope that kind people keep coming here because the problem is still very much too large without them."

Getting Documents Together

So excited, I received an email back from an agency in the States that works with the agencies in Kenya.

They laid out the entire process for me. Unfortunately the process starts with the homestudy, so clearly I cannot do that right now.

In the meantime, though, I can be gathering all the certified and notarized documents that I will need for the I800A form.

Those will take a while to obtain, so at least I can do a little leg work on that now.

Here is a photo I found of the I800A form on someone else's adoption blog. Wowee!

(found on this site where she documented her timeline adopting from China)

Forming You

Today at church the children presented the adults each with a gift that they have been working on for the past 4 weeks in childrens' church. A framed Word from the Lord.

A little blonde haired girl walked up to me and handed me this frame.

I began to read it and immediately thought of our Baby.

This was such a great Word. Thank you Jesus.

Dear Baby,

I do not know whether you are born yet or whether you are still being formed, like the Psalmist describes. But I know God is making you in a wonderful way. You are already amazing, and I don't even know you yet! I trust that God will protect you and take care of you until we can be together.

I love you!

-Your Forever Family

Opening Doors

I am doing tons of research online.

I love that so much of the information I need is on the internet now. Even all the forms we will need.

I have found yahoo groups specific to adoption, one even specific to Kenyan adoption. Found many blogs of folks that have adopted in Kenya. Some even listed out in detail their timeline and process (thank you!). Found all three adoption agencies in Kenya online. Found online reviews and ratings of the US adoption agencies. I have sent an email to every agency and person I have come across that has an email address listed. And last night I received my first response email back from a Kenyan adoption agency!!

They informed me that, yes, the U.S. has had a moratorium on Kenyan adoptions for the past two years (because of the Hague Convention and new rules? I'm still not sure how all that works.)

HOWEVER, it was lifted at the end of February 2011, and now they have resumed their U.S. program!!!! "It is possible for you to pursue an adoption in Kenya while you are here." is the exact sentence from their email.

(Excuse me while I jump up and down repeatedly. Okay I'm back.)

They also told me which U.S. agency they work with, who to contact there, and what forms to fill out now. Apparently there are a few forms that take months to obtain approval for, so we can actually file those NOW and cover a lot of ground (read: waiting time!) before we even get to Kenya.

Thank you Jesus for continuing to open doors.

Dear Baby,

We are coming. I cannot think about you without crying. We long for you. We love you!

From: Your Forever Family

Trusting Him in the Details

This was an emotional day for me. I received an email from a friend who left Nairobi last year. When she was there, Kenya had just signed on to the Hague Convention, but had not finalized all the laws for local adoptions. (I think this is stated correctly.) As such, many folks (such as State Dept folk like myself) who were wanting to adopt there were simply not able to.

I called my husband at work and explained, unable to talk because I was crying.

I mean, I already love this baby immensely.

I don't pretend to have any idea of what God's plan is. I trust Him to take care of all the details.
I just know what He has placed in my heart and my husband's heart.

Kevin said this does not change anything. There are neighboring countries that also allow adoption, such as Ethiopia. And that's true. I just assumed it would be Kenya!

Jesus, I trust you.

I found this alert on State's website posted from a week ago. I cannot figure out if this is good news or bad news...

Adoption Alert

U.S. DEPARTMENT OF STATE
Bureau of Consular Affairs
Office of Children’s Issues
__________________________________________________________________

March 2, 2011

Expect Adoption Delays

Kenya and the United States are party to the Hague Convention on Protection of Children and Co-operation in Respect of Intercountry Adoption (“Hague”). As such, all adoptions between Kenya and the United States initiated after April 1, 2008, must meet the requirements of the Hague Convention and its U.S. and Kenya law counterparts. The Government of Kenya is still in the process of amending its laws to mirror the procedural requirements of the Convention. In late 2010, Kenya adopted a new constitution and the government is currently drafting hundreds of pieces of new legislation required to implement the provisions of the new constitution. Due to this legislative back-log, legislation that will bring Kenya into full compliance with the Hague Convention may not be enacted for quite some time.

Until it is, Kenya’s Department of Children’s Services is willing to make administrative adjustments that will allow it to follow the procedural framework required by the Hague Convention. International adoptions that meet Hague Convention requirements can now be processed in Kenya. However, until Kenya’s international adoption laws are finalized, serious delays, expense, uncertainly, and difficulties could still arise with the Hague adoption process. The Department of State therefore advises American citizens to proceed with caution when deciding whether or not to adopt from Kenya.

The U.S. Embassy in Nairobi continues to be in contact with the High Court of Kenya and their Department of Children’s Services concerning the processing requirements of Hague adoption cases. Please continue to monitor this website for the most updated information as it becomes availabl

A Calling

I started a new blog. What a shock! I think I have like 17 blogs at this point.

But this one is a new topic for me - adoption :)

I have found so many helpful adoption blogs so far, and I hope to do the same thing for somebody else in my shoes in the future. I pretty much know nothing about adoption other than God has called us to adopt in Kenya. I don't even know what a homestudy is yet or a referral. I have a lot of research to do. Exciting!

Our adoption journey has been pretty cool so far. So stay tuned!